Thursday, September 23, 2010

Whatever it takes...

I've been continually struck recently by a thought...The realization that life is about far more than ME and MY needs. The realization that I am spoiled...ridiculously so. The realization that I have GOT to do whatever it takes....whatever it ensure that my lifes focus is not on MYSELF, and MY house, and MY vehicle, and my husbands CAREER, and the beauty and earthly succes of my children...oh Lord forgive me. For He put me on this earth for reasons that have a much higher purpose.

I had some errands to run this of those was to purchase some hair bows for my girls. So, I piled the kids in the car and headed in the direction of Avondale...a part of the city that is about 30 minutes from where we live. And as I was driving, I was hit yet again by the realization that the money I was about to spend on those ridiculous hair bows could be put in an envelope to go towards something much food for the homeless, or clean water for those who have none, or a scholarship fund for an orphan child in Russia. I also remembered that the ribbon I use to hang all the girls hair bows became so heavy and weighted down this week (because we have so many hairbows) that it actually fell on the floor due to becoming too point girls do not need anymore hair bows. My cheeks burned as I turned my van around and headed back home.

Yes, we are spoiled. We live in excess and aren't even thankful for it! We (meaning I) want more, more, more....never satisfied. I flip the channel when I see infomercials on african children with their little distended bellies and rib cages jutting makes me uncomfortable. And rather than watch in horror and ACT, I change the channel and try and forget. Because the problem is far too great for me to help, right??...there's no way that little ol' me could really make a difference...right??

What I've realized this week is that I'm wrong...Satan has been lying to me and I've been buyin' it. The truth is, I've only allowed God to use me where I feel comfortable being used...but my natural response to things that make me UNcomfortable is "ooooh, God hasn't called me to that."...what I've realized now is that God will use all of us for far bigger and greater things if we will simply allow ourselves to feel uncomfortable. For years I've been wrong...disgustingly so. But, I'm aware now. And there are going to be some changes in the Eason household from here on out. I fully recognize it's going to be a process...because we are faaaaar more spoiled that I even realize...but we are going to begin taking baby steps in the RIGHT direction.

Please don't ask me what the "Right" direction means!...cause' I just jumped on this crazy train and I'm not quite sure where God's gonna' take it. :-p


Mary Beth said...

I love this post. It's so honest. I have been and continue to be in this exact same place. I know our brokenness will allow God to work in us and through us. We love your sweet family and are praying for you.

Mary Beth

Jamie said...

If the maker of silly bands were to give all the profits to the hungry, a very big dent would be made in poverty, right? Just have to agree that our $3 here and $5 there wasteful ways of throwing money away to satisfy that internal itch could definitely make a difference. Thanks for your post and the uncomfortable reminder! Love you.

Michael and Hannah said...

Love, love your heart. Thanks for the encouragement!